of Bond,Don,IPL and Goodtimes

In a posh Club House in a remote corner of Mysore. As revelers from around the world had gathered to celebrate the 1st and the only victory in the IPL of the Vijay Mallya owned team The Royal Challengers .
“Aree devaanoon mujhe pehchaanon…kahan se ayaa …main hoon Bond, James Bond”.
Said the guy in a expensive velvet black Tuxedo with his arms spread out as he entered the ball room.
All the guys and the gals in the room looked up at him, the gals kept looking a little longer, they couldn’t help it. His masculine body, his broad shoulders, clean shaven face, with deep blue eyes was just irresistible as they swooned around him. As the music began in the ball room.
“Duniyaan mein logoon ne...”and the Bond sang along. As he and the gals swooned and danced. As for the guys, including the Mr. Mallya who wore a pissed off look for most of the IPL finally had this sense of deep relief after winning a match started checking out the skimpily dressed cheer gals he bought all the way from US, dance around this guy Mr.Bond(who was newly signed by MR.Mallya as RC's new Brand Ambassodor) saying “ huttidaree kannada nadali hutta beku, madve adare James Bond ne agabeku”.(If ur born u shud do so in Karnataka,If u wanna get married,you shud marry JAmes bond)
But Good Times don’t last long. The music stopped( much to relief of Mr.Mallya who was starting to get his “pissed off look” back)as abruptly as the arrival of Bond himself.
Caught up in the middle of a really difficult dance steps some of the cheer gals lost balance and fell, as the angry Bond looked the for the source to this untoward incident.
And then there arrived another guy in a better tuxedo , he was brawn, his black shades covered his otherwise sharp brown eyes as he walked in with petty gals dressed in their golden but stupid looking helmet on their heads clinging to him by the side .He gave a naughty dimpled smile to the cheer gals who had fell down and took out his gun which had an attached silencer, took a aim at the ‘Bhang drunk’ James Bond .’shhhDiskaaavoonsshh ’a muffled bullet was fired and it hit Bond squarely on the chest as he fell down with a thud.
And as the gals shrieked and ran to corners and hid behind the brooding but fat enough to cover their ass Mr.Mallya, the guy with pretty gals wearing helmets swinged his gun and brings it closer to his lips and blows the smoke coming out from the gun’s nozzel.
And then with the same naughty dimpled smile ,he proclaims, “Name is d…d…d..Don, simply…. d..d…d…Don!! Saale mera line copy karta hein huh Bondi??”
And the gals go weak in their knees again and start swooning around him.
And the music begins again….this time in bengali ..”Korbo lorbo jeethbo ree….All the Kings men we rule!!”
And Mr. Mallya is pissed off again as he yelled out at the new Team Manager Mr.Patel ,"Who the Hell invited this guy???”. As Mr. Patel meekly replied “Sir, due to falling popularity of our team we signed him as our Brand Ambassador aswell and named him King of GoodTimes!!!"
And thus Mr.Mallya fired Mr.Patel too claiming he was kept out of it and had no role in selecting the Brand Amassodors too to the media!!

3 mistakes of my life- Review

Stop readin this stupid review and catch the book!!
Funny,witty,dark, 95 Rs what more can you ask for??
3 stars for 3 mistakes and 1 for Chetan bhagat
My Ratings(making it sound like a film critc) - 4/5

And if you didn't make sense of who is chetan Bhagat or whats 3 mistakes, Nevermind, Duh!!

when Devdas Raps

Devdas :Ahem Ahem
I dont know what to write,
Not coz am not that bright
but just am not so tight!!;)

I wonder what to post after days,
My imaginations are gone without a trace,
all the alchohol and 'sharaab' are a waste!!


Paaro: Waah Waah Subaan allah!!! :D

Crowd: Once more!!*Hoot* *Hoot*

You: Arghaaaaa.....NOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Devdas: Muhuhahahahaaa( his Trademark Evil Laugh )

Ahem Ahem....(and he goes on)

College Chronicles

Beigining of sem and in some cases throughout the sem
Question: What class do we have next hour?
Assured replies:
1. I don't know.
2. What difference does it make? nan antu malko tini( Ill Sleep anyways).
3. Well, Iam hungry.
4. Eh? Yaake?(Why)
5. I don't know.Class ge hogtidya??(Going to class?)
6. No idea, is there attendance?
7. Loo. I got IPod (with some videos ;)). We can share the earphone.
8. hehe, good one.

Somewher in middle comes the internals/unit test:
Question: How did you do?
Common reply: Who gives a fuc*? Its only Internals.


At the time of end-sem exam.
Question: How did you do?
Majority replies:
1. I got screwed.
2. I got f***ed.
3. I'm surely getting kicked
5. This university sucks, they're screwing us.
6. And more Desi guys will be like "Hodskotu macha","All clean Gaurentee","Bido eno
aitu,nindu?As for gals they will be more secretive and usually depends on their friends opinion." oh nandu chanagaitu"(mine was good too) or "hoon kane nadu hoitu"( ya mine went down too) depending on who they tallking with.

Completely unacceptable reply: [Don't try this at home or in college ;)]
Fuc*in' awesome sisya/machi!!! FCD for sure this time!!! (you'll probably be dead by the time you finish this sentence,coz you're surrounded by pissed off students who've just come out of the exam hall)

Apart from these,College Students:

Can only talk about or go to Movies,have complete 'knowledge' of Celebs,Play Games on XBox or PS3 and not on TV video games(thats like being in 20,000 BC according to my friend),Have a IPhone/pod/touch, interested in gals/guys,will know the best place to eat,drink.
Nothing is unhealthy as long as its edible,unless your are on 'diet'.A bottle of mineral water cost more than bottle of Coke/pepsi nevermind the quantity.Caffeine is way of life.
Lastly we got no clue who the Vice President of India is !

the conversation

JAADU:Buzz! Buzz
Me: Stop doing that!! Its irritating...
JAADU:yeah i know, i just wanted to get ur attention. u have a big decision to make today.
Me:how big?
JAADU:"Change you for better’ kinda big
Me: eh? And who are you? you are from ‘ Koi mil gaya’ aren’t u?
JAADU:well im not human. im another species from a different galaxy on a mission to earth
Me:stop flattering urself.. and im no Hrithik roashan.
JAADU:ok, just let ur cynicism hang for a bit and listen to me.. i cant stress enough on how important this is
Me:alright, u got my attention.. for now. What is it?
JAADU:i say, you have to answer me one question and on that answer rests the your fate
Me: wow! talk about pressure! go on, shoot
JAADU:is what you want to be in life, so different from your ancestors?
Me:WTF! i dont even understand ur question
JAADU:what i mean is, do u think you are ready to take the next step in life?
Me: why do u want to know? and how is it going to change me?
JAADU:i want to know bcos that is my mission. i have to ask u this question and based on ur answer i take my action
Me:tell me all ur possible actions
JAADU:if u say u do believe in yourself and you agree you need to change then i help u.. if not, i terminate myself and let u be.
Me:why me? why now?
JAADU:u were the chosen one bcos of ur personality and understanding of the human mind. Your stupidity and pj cracking skills helped too.
Me:oh i see.yeah am good at those things..Yo!!..Btw u didnt answer, why now?
JAADU:it is the right time now bcos its the month of may.
Me: May? Whats that got to do with anything...all i can think of is my exam!
JAADU:yup.thank god you remembered that.
JAADU:btw - last time we were here, we gave one of the the apes "curiosity".. and practically set evolution of humans in motion.. u better believe that too.
Me:wow! so what r u going to do this time, if i answer yes?
JAADU:what do u think?
Me:how the heck should i know? u r the advanced species.. tell me what u do?
JAADU:i know what i have to do.. i have my orders.. first, i would like to hear what u think
Me:so many things have to change at so many levels.. the answer might be simple but it is definitely not easy
JAADU:ok, fair enough.. just give me a yes or no..
Me: yes,things need to change
JAADU: hmm, Good that you agreed, and here is how you change yourself for good its a simple 3 step process .
1st step: wake up, get your big head off the keyboard
2nd step: and sign off from Yahoo!!!
3rd step : This is the month of may, the month of Exam, your end sem Exam so.... study for your exam!!
Me: Argghhaa.... I just took a break and a short nap!!!
JAADU : yeah rite, your break lasted long, way longer and keyboard ain’t a place to take ur naps!!You lazy bugger .
Me: ok k k …but you were sweeter in the movie!!
JADOO : one more thing, I have no idea what that “ om om om om” means, tell that Roshan guy!!!

mr & mrs

Mr. - Mrs.
He - She
Hero - Heroine
Male - Female

Boy - Girl

guy : Haha Boys are independent!!
gal : So are girls.humph!*false anger *
guy : Err sorry,sorry,chorrie.....sweety!
gal : *blushing* hmmm saaku saaku :)( enough enough )

And thats independence??? *sigh*

on a Sunday morning..

The summer Sun has just raised over the horizon,
Spreadin in and around, its beautiful golden light,
Its a beautiful day.
Its neither hot like the afternoons,
nor is it rainy like the night before.
Patches of smoky white clouds
dot the brilliant golden sky,
as birds of feather fly past them.
Men and beautiful women walk, run and jog,
with their pet dogs,children(usually obese) and some times mad dogs behind.
Little birds with unlucky worm in their legs cripping on plant,
and bigger birds cawing on the electric wires( grasing the neighbouring Uncles and Aunts with their morning crap)
Your mother waters the gardens,while
your father checks the morning news with a masala Chai.
Its a perfect Sunday morning...











As for you,don't you just Love going back to sleeep on days like this!!!;)

ahhaa Nirvana!!
*ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZ*